A LOT more than you may have heard

Transformation

The caterpillar does not become a butterfly by fixing it’s catarpillar problems. It transforms by unleashing the butterfuly that was always in there.

Transforamtion is when you become the next version of yourself. The keyword is BECOME. There are several ways this can happen and we LOVE all of them.

• Develop a next level of a skill
• Enter a new territory and do something completely new
• Awaken to a new possibility or awareness
• Uplevel a belief that was conflicting with your dream

Coaching

There are many different definitions of Coaching; this is understandable because life is so wild and diverse.

We have a philosophy that we feel honors the origins of coaching from athletics, performance arts, the hero’s journey and the human potential movement. AND one that speaks to our greater purpose of uplifting humanity toward egalitarian freedom.

A person – a player – with this level of sophisticated support can do amazing things that they would not otherwise do. But more importantly, they can BECOME the next version of themselves in the experience.

Coaching always rides on the parallel tracks of doing (what and how) and becoming (who and why).

Learning how to provide this sophisticated level of guidance, care, support and challenge will be one of the most amazing personal growth adventures you ever undertake.

Human Connection Transformation Coaching Is…

1. An Epic Personal Egalitarian Relationship
2. to Expand Awareness and Facilitate Growith
3. with Playful Co-Creation and Guided PRACTICE
4. for the Player’s Dream and a Better World for EVERYONE

A Player

A growth-oriented person with a Dream to do something in the world that takes them beyond who they are now into the next version of themselves.

A Coach

A coach is an energized and capable partner with special skills and techniques dedicated to facilitating growth with guided PRACTICE to play a Dream better.

A Coaching Session

A time where the player and coach put EVERYTHING else to the side and focus on growing, both individually and together, through guided PRACTICE to play a Dream Better.

IT is so liberating and SOOOOO much fun.

Coaching is amazing for both the coach and the pleyer because we Humans LOVE facilitating growth.

We LOVE to facilitate growth in people we enjoy and care about.

We LOVE when someone we trust facilitates our growth.

It’s a strong Human Nature thing.

This is why there are so many valuable endeavors and professions that facilitate growth.

Therapists and teachers facilitate growth.

Councelors and consultants facilitate growth.

Mentors and motivational speakers facilitate growth

And many, many more.

But there is ONE THING that is truly unique to coaching.

Coaches facilate growth by guiding practice!

SIMPLE.

The AWESOME INNOVATION at CoachVille:
Guided Practice for Life!

At CoachVille we are ALWAYS innovating and experimenting. It is in our company DNA. Over the past 15 years, we have been experimenting with ways to bring practice to Life Coaching.  In 2023, it all came together in our breakthrough program: Human Connection Transformation Coaching.

We have developed a set of techniques and concepts that facilitate growth by guiding practice of Human Connection Skills.

Human Connection Transformation is Next Generation Coaching

Next Generation Coaching is coaching for the emerging Connected Culture. The Connected Culture is a Coaching Culture where together, we uplift each others powers of human nature and human connection rather than putting each other under control!

As Artificial Intelligence (AI) becomes an inescapable part of our lives and businesses, Human Connection Skills will become the most important skills EVER.

So here is the easy way to understand this:

Tennis coaches practice tennis with you. All athletic coaches guide practice.

Singing coaches practice singing with you. All performance art coaches guide practice.

For Life Coaches, including business, leadership and career coaches, this was a little tricky because there was the question: how do we practice life?

As a Life Coach, what you can practice with your players is Human Connection Skills in any situation that requires better Human Connection. AKA… ALMOST EVERYTHING.

So now we call it Human Connection Transformation Coaching.

So…

Human Connection coaches practice Human Connection with you.

And also, for those of us the are used to calling ourselves Life Coaches:
Life Coaches practice Human Connection with you.

SIMPLE.

Let’s go a little deeper into each of the elements from the philosophy / definition:

1. An epic personal relationship

Coaching is a personal relationship. The Coach and Player care about each other as individuals. It is a significant upgrade from the ideas we got about the “Industrial Age Professional” that was robotic, impersonal and transactional.

This also rules out of the coaching field several Industrial Concepts of coaching such as:

• A leveraged “coaching program” of watching expert videos, or
• a “coaching watch” that tells you how fast you are running;

neither of these situations would qualify as coaching because there is no two-way relationship.

1a. An Epic Relationship

Coaching relationships are epic because they are so profound. Because with a coach we do things in the world that lead to memorable peak experiences. Because a coaching relationship grows over time on a shared journey when we do something meaningful in our lives that we wouldn’t have done alone.

1b. An Egalitarian Relationship

Coaching is NOT hierarchical..

• The coach is not a servant who is below the client
• The coach is not an authority who is above the client

Coaching is NOT a service, it is a co-created experience. Coaching is a vibrant part of the growing  “Experience Economy”.

Coaching is Egalitarian because the coach and player are equal partners in the relationship even though they have different roles.

Guiding another person on an adventure is a real artform. It is not the same as directing or controlling; but it is much more than a passive companion.

Coaching is profound because it goes beneath the surface of life into feelings, emotions, beliefs, values, desires, possibilities, fears, visions, ideas… the important stuff.

Think about the guide on a hero’s journey like Star Wars Obi Wan Kenobi to Luke Skywalker. They are on the adventure together, they are both actively involved. Obi Wan is demonstrating skills and sharing observations with Luke BUT… Luke makes his own choices about what to do.

Another way to think of this is the Olympic Coach. They are in the Training Center with the athlete every day sharing the dream together. Olympic athletes deeply thank their coach when they win a medal; they know that they could not have done it alone.

BUT… it is also not the 20^th Century, dogmatic athletic or performance art coach barking orders at the subserviant players.

This is vitally important for the Human Family because we must co-create and demonstrate relationships that are NOT controlling. Coaches can lead the way to an Egalitarian Culture where EVERYONE feels connected and valued!

2. To expand awareness and facilitate growth

When we grow we beceome the next version of themselves… over and over again. Especially becoming the version of ourselves who can live the dream that we are imagining.

Coaching is always riding on parallel tracks.

One track is focused on expanding awareness of the inner experience.

The other track is focused on the outer experience of what the player is co-creating and accomplishing in the world around them.

2a. Expanding Awareness

A BIG part of coaching is guiding our player to become more aware.

The more we are aware of, both within us and in what is happening around us, the better choices we make and the better we play.

Our inner experience includes: thoughts, beliefs, emotions, feelings, desires and more.

It is possible to:

• Feel more capable,
• Feel more confident
• Feel more free to fully express oneself.

2b. Expanding capabilities

New awareness often leads to new capabilities.

Expanding capability includes:

• New or expanded skills
• Deeper expression of Human Nature
• Deeper abilities for Human Connection
• Deeper expression of the players YOUnique superpowers

We become the next version of ourselves through:

• guided practice in coaching sessions
• and then by having new experiences in the world;
• and then by co-creating meaning from those experiences in coaching conversations!

3. With Playful Co-creation and Guided Practice

There are 3 core elements to this experience.

3a. Safe Space

Talking together is a big part of how coaching happens.

A key in Human Connection Transformation Coaching is to co-create a safe space for deep and provocative conversations.

When people are talking together in deep conversation with purpose, permission, and presence – as happens in a Coaching relationship – they have the opportunity to “get real” about life. We all need a space where we can be seen and heard. Coaches create this space.

On social media, everyone is excited, delighted and living like a rock star. Meanwhile, most of the time we are not that excited, nor delighted and there are very few true rock stars. Coaching is a space where we can put the happy mask down and be real. Which feels great AND allows us the opportunity to reflect and grow gradually.

One “challenge” with this aspect of coaching is that a) Several other professions, such as counselors, therapists and many healers, also feature the safe space and b) many coach education programs teach ONLY this and call it coaching. This combination leads many people to confuse coaching with these other professions.

When you understand that coaching must also include playful co-creation and guided practice then the confusion disappears.

3b. Playful Co-creation

This brings me to one of my favorite things to share with Coaches and Players!

The ancient power of co-creation!

Through the millennia the wise Humans created a power phrase: “I create as I speak”.

It illuminates the power of the spoken word to shift the energy between two or more people. When people are talking together in deep coaching conversation it can take on a life all its own.

With our words we can speak our Dreams into existence and create the next version of OURSELVES needed to fulfill our dreams.

This is the “magic” of co-creating that makes coaching such a powerful force in the world!

A coach and player will playfully co-create many “things” together:

• ideas,
• plans,
• approaches,
• strategies,
• awareness,
• learning,
• insights,
• and more.

We co-create by sharing intuition, knowledge and personal experiences.

A BIG key to this aspect of coaching is that both the player and the coach must be fully engaged. Both must be fully open, generous, curious and sharing. The type of coaching that comes from “authority” generally lacks the openness and curiosity. The type of coaching that comes from “only asking questions”, lacks the generous sharing of experiences that makes co-creation so powerful.

3c. Guiding PRACTICE

Guiding PRACTICE is the true essence of coaching. (This is why it is in all CAPS in the definition).

A key in Coaching is to co-create a safe space for practice.

Together we can practice situations, conversations, pivotal moments and peak experiences. We can practice skills, using our Superpowers and expressing ourselves in new ways.

Practicing together is how we grow in capability and awareness.

Guided practice means the coach is providing techniques, experience and knowledge to benefit the player.

Through practice the player can experience the new version of themselves or a new ability before they bring it out to the world.

Practice is powerful!

Embodiment –  we can FEEL ourselves in a new experience.

Imagination – we can envision an experience or situation which creates confidence, clarity and courage.

Awareness – we see that new ways of being and responding are possible.

EMBODIMENT is the key because when an activity FEELS natural in our bodies, we are capable, confident and creative in similar situations.

In athletics and arts this is known as “muscle memory”.

WHAT to practice

In Human Connection Transformation Coaching we can practice ANY life situation! But they all have the core of Human Connection Skills:

• Create for Inspiration to SHARE
• Explore for Visibility to INVITE
• Relate for Influence to OFFER
• Co-Create for Inspiration to ENROLL
• Play for Transformation to SHARE

Play and Observe

A BIG part of practicing together is observation and the experience of being SEEN.

We are ALL yearning to be seen by someone who knows what they are looking at! This is different than being seen by someone who doesn’t really know and just thinks everything you do is awesome. We need both in our lives.

At the same time we develop abilities so much faster when we observe someone else doing something that we want to do.

In guided practice, the coach observes the player AND the player observes the coach!

As a coach you are going to share what you see in a judgment-free way that provides outside perspective. As a player you weave the coach’s observations with your own insights and choose your own path.

We all have blind spots in our thoughts and actions because we can’t see ourselves very clearly…with a trusted outside observer a player can really accelerate growth.

At the same time, the player is observing the coach and absorbing their wisdom. This does NOT mean the coach needs to be perfect or have all the answers! Far from it. What it means is that the coach guides by being playful, curious and a touch vulnerable sometimes.

This is the way life is meant to be played.

• We are meant to co-create life with others.
• We are meant to be SEEN and valued by others.
• We are meant to generously lift up each other.

4. For the Players Dream and a Better World for Everyone

All coaching begins when a player has a dream.

A Dream is a desire for new experiences, it is much more than a goal and certainly more than surviving in the status quo.

A BIG transformation in Transformation Coaching is the transformation to a Dream Centered life; as apposed to a survival-centered, obligation-centered or even a goal-centered life. We play Dreams, we work toward goals.

Playing a Dream is like putting a game into the Play Life Station. A Dream is ALIVE!

A Dream includes

Desire – there are new peak experiences that you are yearning for.

Vision & Imagination – you can “See” it and now you want to LIVE it.

Adventure – The path is not laid out in advance. There will be unknowns. There will be challenges, puzzles and mystery.

Accomplishment – There is something tangible that is claimed, created or experienced. Often it is a positive impact on the lives of others that will live on and ripple out.

Becoming – There is a confident new version of YOU who DID THAT!

4b. The pursuit!

A Dream is a powerful “thing” because it is both NOW and in the future at the same time.

We refer to playing your Dream NOW!

We also refer to pursuing your Dream.

Pursuit means moving outword, exploring, adventure and quest. It is more than just “doing the work”.

Playfulness is an awesome Human Nature Superpower. Restoring and maximizing playfulness is a big part of Human Connection Transformation Coaching.

Qualities of playfulness include:

• Curious and Creative
• Resourceful and Resilient
• Exploring and Experimenting
• Fun! (usually, but not always)

4c. Playing BETTER!

Part of any Dream is a vision of playing better.

Playing better is the outword focus of coaching. We practice to play better and then to have the peak experience of doing something better than we have ever done it before. AWESOME!

Playing better means having our desired outcomes happen more often than they did before.

The pursuit of BETTER – and knowing that better is always possible and evolves over time – gives our lives a delicious, uplifting growth orientation.

As players we get to choose what Dream to play.

We get to choose the direction of our growth-orientation.

AND… when we play, we also grow in unexpected and unplanned ways.

Ahhhh… the wonderful mystery of life.

​4d. For a better world for EVERYONE

Anytime an individual plays a Dream to have a positive impact on the people around them, it naturally makes the world better.

And the even more importantly… there is the ripple effect. An individual, with a coach, expanding awareness, growing, co-creating and practicing Human Connection, and sharing their Dream is a powerful inspiration for EVERYONE around them. They become a beacon, a light.

When we see someone we know playing their Dream in this way, it opens up our beliefs that we can play our Dream too!

Team Play for Transformation!

Being a Human Connection Transformation Coach…

You will find that everything that you have figured out about life will serve you well in guiding others; but often not in the way you expect.

You will find that guiding others toward their dreams is quite different than finding your own way. HAH! Understatement.

You will call forth the best of your Human Nature as a relationship builder, co-creator and practice partner.

AWWWW Yeah!

Center for Coaching Mastery Program

You will become someone who can coach like this step-by-step.

You will practice guiding without controlling… it takes quite a bit of practice!!

Link to Center for Coaching Mastery Philosophy

Link to Center for Coaching Mastery Program